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Monday, February 24, 2014

Day 24: like an ocean

Day 24/28: like an ocean

When I first started therapy, I was barely holding myself above the water, barely keeping myself from drowning, and I knew I needed help.

Now, two years later, I have a goal: to be like the ocean. I want to be strong and everlasting, to let my fury be known but also to provide comfort to the lives of those who seek my presence. I want to provide life to people, to rejuvenate those who spend time beside me. I want to become necessary in someone’s heart, something that they can’t live without because they need me so desperately.

One day, I will become an ocean.

Brittany’s ocean
Tynan’s ocean

Sunday, February 23, 2014

Day 23: smudges

Day 23/28: smudges

Somewhere along the line, my edges became smudged. I don’t really remember when it happened, but somewhere between my transition from Maryland to Rhode Island I lost the sharpness that defined me. It vanished in the packed boxes and the goodbyes, leaving behind grey smudges and blurry colors where my feelings leaked out.

Smudges can’t ever be erased. They’re always there, like a shadow, even when you redraw the lines. They’ll always be there as a reminder of what happened.

Brittany’s smudge
Tynan’s smudge

Saturday, February 22, 2014

Day 22: Those who went before us

Day 22/28: those who went before us

As much as we hope we don’t end up like our parents, each of us is a shadow, a reflection or even a patchwork quilt of our ancestors before us. And not all ancestors are blood-related. Who came before you? Who are your artistic or political or career or familial predecessors? Who’s shadow have you walked in and how does it feel?

Brittany’s Ancestors
Tynan’s Ancestors

Friday, February 21, 2014

Day 21: (w)hole

day 21/28: (w)hole

I am whole, but there is this hole inside of me that cannot be seen, cannot be touched or healed with anything but time.


Thursday, February 20, 2014

Day 20: apple of my eye

Day 20/28: apple of my eye

None of you will ever convince me this song by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros is not the cutest thing ever I don’t care HOW OLD IT GETS.

So what’s the apple of your eye? What’s being reflected there most often? What do you love the most?

Brittany’s apple
Tynan’s apple

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Day 19: honestly.

Day 19/28: honestly

"Honestly, I don’t care."
"Honestly, why do I put up with you?"
"Honestly, tell me how you feel."

Brittany’s Moment of Honesty
Tynan’s Moment of Honesty

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Day 18: lull & storm

Day 18/28: lull & storm

((TWO FOR TUESDAY));; There’s always a lull that settles over the earth before a storm. The wind isn’t blowing, the birds have all hidden themselves away, where everything is quiet. It’s peaceful, almost, a deep breath before the wave crashes down over the world.

If you’ve ever been by the ocean before a storm, with the cloud lingering on the horizon, the smell actually changes. Everything sort of becomes sharp, and while the only thing you can hear is the soft lapping of the ocean against the rocks, the smell of the ocean, the crisp freshness of it, becomes clearer to your senses.

And then the storm crashes around you. Maybe you were expecting it, maybe you weren’t. Maybe you board up the windows and weather it like you always do. Maybe you’re so caught off guard that the glass shatters as the wind whips around your house, blowing everything precious to you around. It had the strength to knock over trees, to obliterate whatever is in it’s way.

Storms can be hard, but sometimes, the lull—waiting for the storm itself, when you know it’s coming—is the hardest part.

Brittany's Tempest
Tynan's Tempest